December 12, 2024
"Not all those who wander are lost" - J.R.R Tolkien
Life isn’t about aimless drifting; it’s about moving with intention, even if it’s not immediately obvious to others. Life should be a journey shaped by curiosity, growth, and the confidence of knowing there’s a destination, even if it’s not visible yet. We're onto something & something is on the west.
I really love being useful. Being useful (to oneself and others) brings immense mental clarity and satisfaction. If i remember correctly, my mom always get mad at me if i am trying to help her doing chores. Different case with my brother, though. I am not blaming my parents, they just loves me so much and i am beyond grateful for that. Yet, being stopped from contributing often left a sense of sadness.
Everyone can always stopped me for doing something with just two or three tries, or even once.
Over time, this tendency to avoid resistance shaped a personality that seemed soft, even shapeless. Others might describe me as adaptable or reliable, but I'm lack of firm ground to stand on. Instead of forging a singular path, life for me became a series of responses to what the world demanded. Eventually, my fear is growing. Fear of losing direction entirely. Fear of what kind of place I'll end up in.
The concept of "live in the moment" brought some relief. It offered freedom from past regrets and the uncertainty of future worries. Yet, hearing perspective from those who claim to be "live in the moment" always left me an impression of something missing. Something is still incomplete.
Often times, it's so easy to get rid of anxiety if we just focused on now. But the other times when we don't do anything much, we started to think about "what are we really aiming for?", "where do we want to end", "what kind of life will feel truly fulfilling?" or even "how do we want to be remembered?".
It’s easy, so easy to get lost in the present, but if we don’t have a clear direction, we risk ending up at a destination that might be doesn’t fulfill us.
If we talk in time-wise perspective, some moments pass by so quickly, while others feel incredibly slow. Time itself never changes; it is our perception of it that shapes our experience. When we enjoy a movie, three hours can feel like a mere minutes, or when we love the book we can just finish it in just a few hours. But the question is, does that make it good or bad?
The state of flow (when we are deeply absorbed in an activity) doesn't depend on what we are doing. Even something harmful or bad, if we enjoy it, time will pass for us so quickly.
In reality, 90% or even 95% of our time is spent on the journey, while only 5-10% is used to enjoy the destination. Isn't this question scary?
We need a purposes. We need a hope. We need a dream. We need a glimpse of the future. We need them because it gives us direction and meaning in our journey.
Living in the moment doesn't mean wandering aimlessly--it means being fully present and aware of the journey while keeping a clear purpose in mind.
Tidak khawatir dengan masa depan ≠ tidak memiliki tujuan.
Your purposes. Your dream. Your goals. Define it.
"I want to go to Mars," "I want to create a nuclear battery," "I want to end poverty." It might take forever to accomplish these goals, or they might not even be possible in your lifetime. But by striving for them, you give meaning to every step you take, even the smallest ones, like 0.0000001%. And you will start to see yourself differently.
If we reflect on the bigger picture of life itself, don't we all desire a good ending? Isn't it important to ensure that our journey and destination align with values that truly matter for us?
"Every soul will taste death. And We test you with evil and with good as trial; and to Us you will be returned." - Al Anbiya'; 35